It’s a wrap on 2014
Yep, it may be sad, but it’s true: 2014 is all but over, merely memories of the things we did and said. And, for my last column of this calendar year, I’m gonna’ go back and revisit said year’s Don’t Rush Me ‘gems.? (Or at least just the headlines that caught my attention, whilst reviewing.)
When I put on my columnist hat, I write differently than when I am donning the editor or reporter’s caps. While still fashionable, the columnist’s hat is a little flamboyant when compared to regular news writing or editorial writing head wear. When I am wearing the columnist cap, I hope to be an entertaining, educational, awe-inspiring and sometimes anger inducing writer.
* * *
Headlines are the hook, which hopefully gets you to stop on the page and read what’s under those big, blocky, bold words. In 2014, I believe I started off with a bang! The very first Don’t Rush Me headline of the year told all readers: Don says, this year don’t be stupid! (Is it any wonder I only have four regular readers ? Mom and my three younger sisters?) If I want to build readership maybe I should always be nice and tell you what you want to hear and read?
I probably should have been a more positive role model and headlined that column, Don hopes you’ll be smart this year. Tough rocks, kiddies. I didn’t and I think the rest of the year went down hill from there.
* * *
I liked this headline from January 22, ‘Marijuana’s the bomb and hillbilly logic.? I have no idea what I wrote about, but I got to use the words ‘marijuana? and ‘hillbilly? in the same sentence and when you put those two things together, you just know it’s gonna be exciting.
* * *
My favorite headline of the year came in February, ‘Swammee Don proven right . . . again!?
* * *
March 3 was probably my most educational column of the year. With the aid of the internet as to avoid asking actual smart people questions, I was able to research the wonder of the human body, in particular our ears. And, with a headline like ‘Lets give some love to earwax,? you know you’re in for a good read! Readers learned about both kids of earwax (wet and dry) and learned the stuff is really only made out of dead skin cells, sweat and oils.
Who woulda thunk it?
* * *
Like every columnist worth his or her salt, sometimes you have to write about what readers are talking about and the big story this year was Polar Vortex and snow. At the end of March, hardy Michiganian types were still stuck in winter. My March 26 headline shared the sentiments of at least 50 percent of our state’s population: ‘Record schmecord. I am done with snow!?
(For Your Information: last year at this time we had 15 inches of snow.)
* * *
I got a little philosophical this year, too. Column headlines included, ‘Civil discourse a thing of the past?? and ‘Artificial outrage gets his goat.? and, ‘Thud, thud. Thrown under the bus and more.? Also, together we pondered one of life’s great mysteries with this column, ‘What’s the meaning of Don’s ice-scraper??
Readers, riddle me this: What is the meaning of philosophy, anyway? That’s your 2015 goal, to enlighten me.
* * *
In 2014 a lot of readers wrote me and not without a little prompting. In July I put out this headline, ‘Here’s your chance to make 50 bucks the easy way.? I asked readers to explain why they like their community paper ? the winner got 50, one dollar bills. The winner was Diane DeClerck, who then had me give the $50 to the Devoted Friends Animal Society in Ortonville.
* * *
All in all, 2014 was a fun year to pen columns for you ? I even got to fill in as a guest writer for the blog, Ready Dressed Go!
Thank you for your support and heres to an entertaining, educational, awe-inspiring and anger-inducing 2015!
As always, e-mail your comments to Don@ShermanPublications.org