Haley and Trevor, along with their parents, Susan and Tim Speed and sister Savannah, live within a mile of me, and whereas I see the twins quite often, the three of us don’t spend a lot of time together. As an adult, as their grandfather, it is my fault.
I feel very inadequate talking to the young. Hazel went to see them every morning at 8:00 and left reluctantly.
Nearly all mothers I know can carry on conversations, create activities, smooth feelings, hug and really show and express their love to the younguns.
A father and now grandfather, I bond like this:
‘Hi, how are you??
or
‘What did you do today??
or
‘How’s your dog??
That’s about it. I may tease and try to tickle them.
When I go into their house they come and see me, if a particular toy hasn’t more appeal, then go hide, yelling back, ‘Try and find me.?
Recently, at their 5th birthday party, I got to watch and click pictures of them opening gifts . . . enough gifts to necessitate an addition to their home.
Haley is now two inches taller than her brother, and according to my lifting test somewhat heavier.
As they sat side by side with about an equal number of openables, Haley would open, say a doll box with numerous accessories. She would unwrap the box, take out the doll, hold it up with great smiles, then do the same with each sock, shoe, bracelet, and piece of clothing provided.
Trevor’s expressions were ever changing. If it was a toy he’d smile. If it was clothes, he’d frown. If he really disliked a shirt he’d toss it aside. He opened a Nintendo, not that I know what that is, and his mother asked, ‘Is that the one you wanted??
He quickly said, ‘No!? and shoved it under a pillow. That makes a giver feel really good.
And so it went for an hour or so. He was through with his rip, toss and grab routine in maybe 30 seconds. If her mother and sister didn’t help her Haley would still be smiling and examining puzzle parts.
That day I learned there are more differences between boys and girls than I’ve been thinking since I was their age.