When Pero the Shriner clown visited me recently, he gave me a book, ‘The Quotable Will Rogers.?
You almost have to be my age to remember Will Rogers. Dubbed the cowboy philosopher, he was an entertainer, humorist, radio personality, actor and newspaper columnists who specialized in lariat tricks on stage.
Here are three of his quotes:
‘You can look at half the guys? stomachs in the world and you can see they don’t know how to order for themselves.?
‘What we need is cleaner minds and dirt under our fingernails.?
‘Great artists say the most beautiful thing in the world is a baby. Well, the next is an older lady, for every wrinkle is a picture.?
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Having written over 2,500 columns for our newspapers, I feel as qualified for a Ph.D. degree as any college professor. They are allowed to exist on a campus for 25 years, write a thesis and retire.
A couple of definitions of that degree have come my way. Doctor of Philosophy and Piled High and Deep.
I can only guess that President Obama and US Attorney General Eric Holder have these degrees. Holder linked the two in his raciest remarks: ‘What other president and attorney general have been treated like us??
First of all, we’ve never had two like them, colored or white. No one in their political position have ever played the race card to their constituents like Holder recently did.
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Global warming is being studied on all sides. The side getting the most exposure has political overtones. By political overtones, I mean companies and organizations with financial promises from promoters of these agendas. Both sides claim to have scientific evidence to back their cause.
With that foremost in mind, I see no reason to do anything but live for the rising sun tomorrow, and click my tv ‘off? clicker a little more often.
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One of my urologists told a group of men our active sex life is 40 years. Then he told us of a man who sought a longer sex life. This man knew monkeys have a longer endurance, 60 years. So, he befriended a monkey and asked him to give him 10 of his 60 years. The monkey gave the man 10 years.
But the man still wanted more.
He sought out a lion, known to have decades of the ‘good? life. The lion agreed to give the man 20 years.
With these added years the man got 10 years of monkeying around and 20 years of lion-ing about his new found endurance.