Cycle of love

Alicia Avery knows the hardships endured by a family battling cancer.
She also knows how support in the fight is essential and Avery went on a journey of more than 300 miles to help ease the suffering of others, a mission that has not quite reached its end.
In May 2013, Alicia Van Dis and Justin Avery were about three months away from their wedding day when they learned his mother’s breast cancer, banished almost a decade earlier, had returned.
Justin, a musician on tour as a background singer with the artist Meatloaf, and Alicia, a 2000 Brandon High School graduate who owns a senior citizen placement agency, left their Los Angeles home that June to be at the side of Dianne Avery, as well as Justin’s father, Larry, and brother, Kyle, in Traverse City. They stayed there that summer, helping to care for Dianne as she underwent chemotherapy. Wedding plans continued and Alicia was Dianne’s personal shopper, bringing dresses for her to try on at home.
On Aug. 24, 2013 Alicia and Justin were married in Traverse City. The mother of the groom, while very sick, led the conga line at the reception.
‘She looked beautiful, amazing,? said Alicia. ‘I thought she was getting better.?
But just a week after the wedding, the family learned the cancer had metastasized to Dianne’s brain. They brought her home and set up a bed in the dining room and Alicia slept next to her mother-in-law in case she needed anything.
‘We looked for the blessings in the nightmare,? said Alicia. ‘They are a very musical family and we would put on music and she would sing…She loved Christmas music and she was conducting the orchestra along with Andrea Bocelli, ‘Angels we have heard on high,? and though we’d love for her to be here, we were grateful for the time we had with her.?
Dianne Avery died peacefully on Sept. 27, 2013 surrounded by her family, just over a month after seeing Justin and Alicia married, and less than five months after the disease returned.
Dianne’s family and friends had done all they could to ease her passing, but Alicia found herself feeling like she hadn’t done enough. She told her husband she wanted to do something special in honor of Dianne.
Because Dianne’s breast cancer was considered a pre-existing condition due to her battle less than 10 years before, she was uninsured.
‘The hospital really helped us a lot,? recalls Alicia. ‘At the end of the day it worked out, but I noticed how difficult everything was emotionally. Our family got a lot of support from friends and family and strangers around us and I wanted to raise money to help other families with the financial burden, in a more personal experience.?
Although she hadn’t rode a bicycle since she was a child in Ortonville, Alicia decided to do a bike ride to raise funds for cancer patients and their families.
‘My husband was like, ‘You’re crazy,?? laughs Alicia. ‘So I bought a bike, mostly because I didn’t want to run or walk. It’s kind of how I roll.?
She went on the youcaring.com fundraising website and started a fund ‘Families fighting cancer,? for donations to a couple families she was aware of in a similar situation, with some money also to be given to Munson Healthcare Regional Foundation, which will be distributed to the Women’s Cancer Fund and Cancer Patient Needs.
Alicia began training in L.A., starting with 20 mile rides on bike paths and working up to 50-55 mile rides, training six days a week.
On Aug. 4, she started the actual ride in Kendallville, Ind., where Dianne is from and where she sold her art, Santas drawn on driftwood, at craft shows. The ride would end in Traverse City, at the home Dianne had shared with Larry, her husband of 40 years. Alicia would be followed by family as she rode, staying each night at motels along the route.
The first day was a long one, but Alicia’s favorite as she rode 82 miles through Amish country. She logged 75 miles the second day and 72 on the third, on roads just outside of Grand Rapids and then into more rural areas. The third day was her easiest and on the fourth and fifth days she rode the White Pine Bike Trail, logging between 50-55 miles each of the last two days before rolling into the Avery driveway at last.
‘It was a spiritual journey for me,? she said. ‘I had days I would just start crying about my mother-in-law. I felt she was there to give me the strength and thinking about her pushed me that much farther. Just me and the road, and her in spirit and nothing else… it was a once in a lifetime experience and brings you back to the whole idea of humility and gratitude. Life is out of our control? you have to take each day as your last and treat others as you want to be treated and live it up, don’t worry about the little things, they don’t matter in the end. Be grateful for the time you have with friends and family.?
‘The first day and last day were the most emotional, I was bawling on the highway, but it felt good,? she continued. ‘It was so amazing, riding up into Traverse City, it was exhilarating and empowering to know I did that. It was a mountain of a project, I was scared and I promised myself I would do it for Dianne and I did it.?
As Alicia rode into the sub they lived in, she was greeted by a finish line ribbon put up by her husband, father-in-law and brother-in-law. Also there were other members of her family and some family friends and they all greeted her with hugs. That day, in true Avery family style, they had a barbecue, and the next day, on Aug. 9, what would have been Dianne’s 61st birthday, the family rode bikes together around Traverse City to her favorite spots.
Alicia raised nearly $1,000 with her ride and is leaving the fundraising page, http://www.youcaring.com/other/families-fighting-cancer/210211, up until Christmas, Dianne’s favorite holiday, in the hopes of raising more for those families facing the struggle she and her family knows all too well.
‘I was so speechless by the love and support from our family and from people who didn’t even know us,? said Alicia. ‘I want other families to feel this support… We went through such an ordeal, it could have broken us and left us way worse than it did. There might be other families out there who don’t know where to turn and I want to give them a little light at the end of the tunnel and relief.?