Taking a few hits and missing some swings

Is the name Cabrera in Argentina like the name Smith in America? In the Tigers vs White Sox game each team had one, and there was one on the leader board at a recent pro golf tournament.
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Thomas Solwell, an African American columnist with Creators Syndicate, recently wrote my belief about Sen. Barack Obama’s speechmaking: ‘You don’t need to know the facts when you have cocky ignorance and the media behind you.?
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A note to my son by Frank McKinley, from the early 1900s: ‘The worst waste of breath, next to playing the saxophone, is advising a son.?
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Joyce Kilmer wrote, ‘I think that I shall never see a poem lovely as a tree.?
John Patrell wrote, ‘I think that I shall never see the price of gas begin with a 3.?
When Patrell was a kid and played in the sandbox his cat kept covering him up.
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If I liked puns, I’d probably like this one: There was a man who entered the local newspaper’s pun contest. He sent in ten puns, hoping that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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I recently opened Bathroom Reader a book I got for Christmas, 2004. So, suffer with me a little while:
? With over 50 foreign cars already on sale here, the Japanese auto industry isn’t likely to carve out a big slice of the U. S. Market for itself.? – Business Week, 1968.
? The horse is here to stay, but the automobile is only a novelty–a fad.? – Marshall Foch, French strategist, 1911
? Why do we say something is out of whack? What’s a whack?
? On average, cats spend 30% of their waking hours grooming themselves. They purr at 26 cycles per second, about the same frequency as an idling diesel engine. I wish ma’dog, Shayna could purr. I’m sure it would be a better sound than now.
* * *
Two old guys are pushing their carts around one of those big box stores when they collide. The first old guy says to the second guy, ‘Sorry about that. I’m looking for my wife, and I guess wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.?
The second old guy says, ‘That’s okay, it’s a coincidence. I’m looking for my wife, too. I can’t find her and I’m getting a little desperate.?
The first old guy says, ‘Well, maybe I can help you find her. What does she look like??
The second old guy says, ‘Well, she is 27-years-old, tall, with red hair, blue eyes, long legs, big bust and is wearing short shorts. What does your wife look like??
To which the first old guy says, ‘Doesn’t mater, — let’s look for yours.?
* * *
Holy, moly! The Detroit Tigers swept the 3-game series with the league leading Chicago White Sox. We better order our World Series tickets and put our name in for season tickets for 2009.
I’d have the same response if the Detroit Lions won two in a row.
* * *
Limerick time:
An accident really uncanny
Occurred to my elderly Granny;
She sat down in a chair
While her false teeth lay there,
And bit herself right in the fanny.

Is the name Cabrera in Argentina like the name Smith in America? In the Tigers vs White Sox game each team had one, and there was one on the leader board at a recent pro golf tournament.
* * * *
Thomas Solwell, an African American columnist with Creators Syndicate, recently wrote my belief about Sen. Barack Obama’s speech making: ‘You don’t need to know the facts when you have cocky ignorance and the media behind you.?
* * * *
A note to my son from Frank McKinley, from the early 1900s: ‘The worst waste of breath, next to playing the saxophone, is advising a son.?
* * * *
Joyce Kilmer wrote, ‘I think that I shall never see a poem lovely as a tree.?
John Patrell wrote, ‘I think that I shall never see the price of gas begin with a 3.?
When Patrell was a kid and played in the sandbox, his cat kept covering him up.
* * * *
If I liked puns I’d probably like this one: There was a man who entered the local newspaper’s pun contest. He sent in ten puns, hoping that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
* * * *
I recently opened Bathroom Reader a book I got for Christmas, 2004. So, suffer with me a little while:
? With over 50 foreign cars already on sale here, the Japanese auto industry isn’t likely to carve out a big slice of the U. S. Market for itself.?-Business Week, 1968.
? The horse is here to stay, but the automobile is only a novelty–a fad.? -Marshall Foch, French strategist, 1911
? Why do we say something is out of whack? What’s a whack?
? On average, cats spend 30% of their waking hours grooming themselves. They purr at 26 cycles per second, about the same frequency as an idling diesel engine. I wish ma’dog, Shayna could purr. I’m sure it would be a better sound than now.
* * * *
Two old guys are pushing their carts around one of those big box stores when they collide. The first old guy says to the second guy, ‘Sorry about that. I’m looking for my wife, and I guess I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.?
The second old guy says, ‘That’s okay, it’s a coincidence. I’m looking for my wife, too. I can’t find her and I’m getting a little desperate.?
The first old guy says, ‘Well, maybe I can help you find her. What does she look like??
The second old guy says, ‘Well, she is 27-years-old, tall, with red hair, blue eyes, long legs, big bust and is wearing short shorts. What does your wife look like??
To which the first old guy says, ‘Doesn’t matter, — let’s look for yours.?
* * * *
Holy, moly the Detroit Tigers swept the 3-game series with the league leading Chicago White Sox. We better order our World Series tickets and put our name in for season tickets for 2009.
I’d have the same response if the Detroit Lions won two in a row.
* * * *
Limerick time:
An accident really uncanny
Occurred to my elderly Granny;
She sat down in a chair
While her false teeth lay there,
And bit herself right in the fanny.