Dear Editor,

Joe Bob Briggs, drive in movie critic, fake redneck and lover of B movies has something to help us understand Paul Lucas’ letters to The Citizen.

While reviewing low budget flicks, Joe Bob scored them with categories such as number of exploding hillbillies, number of pints of blood, number of bared…er…anatomical parts, finishing with a score on the vomit meter.

Readers of The Citizen’s Viewpoint section will recall my defense of any letter to the Editor. There is no incorrect letter. This page is “The Voice of the People.” Thanks to The Citizen for its consistent, neutral approach. Instead of responding to the factual errors in Mr. Lucas’ letters, I invite readers to apply a Joe Bob approach: counting categories. How many fake Obama claims? Do we find any attacks on Korean War Veterans? How many this letter? Are there exclamation points? Of course there are. How many in a row? (I counted a salvo of 5 in one letter.) How about all caps comments, attacks on senior citizens and medication suggestions for other writers? In his last few letters Mr. Lucas has devolved into conspiracy theories, so let’s add that category. In his letter Go Trump, Mr. Lucas Offers medication advice once, demeans a Korean War vet once, adds 15 exclamation points, 3 and again 5 in a row, has 9 words in all caps, offers  2 conspiracy theories. In his most recent letter, Selective Memory, Mr. Lucas treats us to 4 claims about Obama, insults a Korean War vet 1 time, hits the exclamation point key a whopping 17 times, with 3 in a row 3 times. All caps words are counted 14 times, stale conspiracy theories come in @4. Since we do not have Joe Bob’s vomit meter, perhaps we can develop a Weariness Scale for Mr. Lucas’ frequent, repetitive missives. On a scale of 1 to 10, I give Mr. Lucas a 12.

Bonnie Beltramo