Is it me, or are there more and more “National” days these days? There are so many it’s really kinda hard to keep up with all the “National” fill in the blank days.

To satisfy my curiosity, I hopped on the old internet and searched for “National Days In February.” Holy, jump the shark, Batman!

I found myself on the National Days Today website (NationalDaysToday.com) and discovered in February, our shortest month of the year with 28 days (sometimes 29) there are 77 “National Days.” How can some days represent more than one “National Day,” that just doesn’t seem fair. I’m a firm believer in the old mantra of “One man, one vote.” And, following that logic, I think it should be “One day, one National Day recognized.”

Get a load of this: Just this week, from Sunday, Feb. 5 to Saturday, Feb. 11, there are 22 listed “National” days.” Here are the “National” days for this week:

February 5: National Shower with a Friend Day, “an ironic way to teach people about the importance of filtered water that does not have chlorine;” World Nutella Day, National Weatherperson’s Day, in commemoration of John Jeffries birth year (1744) and his contributions as one of America’s first weather observers.

February 6: National Lame Duck Day, marks the ratifying of the 20^th Amendment to the Constitution of the United States (this amendment moved the beginning and ending of the terms of the president and vice president from March 4 to January 20, and of members of Congress from March 4 to January 3.); National Frozen Yogurt Day which celebratesa way of recognizing the sweetness of frozen yogurt.

February 7: National Send a Card to a Friend Day, “serving as a reminder for us to progressively use the mail as a means for sending friendly cheer;” National Fettuccine Alfredo Day, National Periodic Table Day, National Boy Scout Day, National Kite Flying Day, and National Iowa Day

February 9: National Pizza Day, National Toothache Day, “this day is celebrated to give a subtle reminder to you to take good care of your teeth.”

February 10: National Umbrella Day, National Home Warranty Day and National Cream Cheese Brownie Day

February 11: National Make a Friend Day, National Don’t Cry Over Spilled Milk Day, “celebrates a spirit of positivity and encourages moving away from regrets and negativity; National Inventor’s Day, National White Shirt Day, National Shut-In Visitation Day, and National Peppermint Patty Day.

Where do they come up these days and more importantly, how do I get one?

I want a day. I think I deserve a “National Day.”

I like National Give Don A Hug Day, or because I believe the name Donald is going extinct (no one names their kid Donald these days and it’s a damn shame), let’s have a National Name Your Son Don Day. How about National Give Don A Break Day? Maybe I’m thinking too hard on this and should simplify my self-grandiosing and simply have a National Don Day.

The more I thought of it, the more I wanted to make this happen, so I went back to the internet and much to my surprise (and yes, regret) some other person must have beat me to the punch. I typed in the search engine, “National Don Day,” and son-of-gun, it popped up! Aside from another Don, who woulda’ thunk it?

According to the What National Day Is It website, “It’s Don day on the 24th of October.”

That’s it. There is nothing else about “National Don Day.” Nothing on the wonderfulness of Don. Nothing on what it’s about, why we love Don, or how to celebrate – nothing. What a rip-off and why was I not made aware of this day? Readers, we need to do something about this ASAP, so we can have everything ready for the big October celebration of Don. I am enlisting your help readers: How should we celebrate my day (and yes, I am taking this day over).

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Back on the internet I wanted to know how “National” days happen. And, just like skinning cats, there are more than one way to get a day. First, you can talk to your buddy the Congresswoman and she can convince Congress to give you your day with an Act of Congress. Or, you can talk to the President himself and he can make a proclamation.

Since none of us average Americans would make it past the National Security protection detail, an easier way is to go online to a website like NationalDayCalendar.com and register your day. According to the website, “Applications must be sent at least 6 weeks before to be included in the digital form of the current calendar year. For inclusion in the printed version of the National Day Calendar, acceptance must take place and be finalized by Dec 31 to be included in the next following year . . .”

However, they added, “DUE TO A SUBSTANTIAL BACKLOG, WE ARE ONLY ACCEPTING APPLICATIONS FROM COMPANIES AND ORGANIZATIONS AT THIS TIME.” (And, yes, they used all caps in that sentence.)

Hey, has anyone around here made a “National” day? If so, let me know.

Send your comments to, DontRushDon@gmail.com

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