The Review is pleased to introduce ‘Your Children? by Dave Rozema, a professional family counselor.

This being the first column for The Review, I would like to thank you for reading and encourage you to continue to look for future columns on parenting and child and adolescent issues.
When you look at the warning signs of most adolescent issues, you would think that every adolescent has whatever problem is being explained. Things like sleeping long hours, being moody and defiant, or changing eating patterns are all normal behaviors and they are symptoms of other issues. How to know the difference can be very hard to figure out. If you’re thinking about it, then you should at least consider there may be a problem and look into it a little deeper.
If you become concerned, trust your intuition. Parents too often ignore signs even when their gut tells them something is wrong. Keep some notes or a log of what kind of changes you observe, when and how often they occur. It is the nature of an adolescent to be moody, but a consistent bad mood over a period of time is not normal.
You know your child best. Things that are typical for one child may not be typical for others. Be alert to things that just seem not to fit. Some children are, and always have been, timid and shy. When it is normal behavior you may not like it, but it is not something to cause alarm. If distancing themselves is different for your child and lasts more than a couple of weeks, then something may be going on that signals a problem.
You should not necessarily be concerned about isolated changes, but should be alert to any disturbing patterns of change. Sleeping more or less is not alarming by itself, but combined with a change in eating patterns and a trend toward isolation tells you there may be a problem.
The types of changes to watch for include:
? Sleeping or eating more or less
? Lack of concentration
? Difficulty following through with responsibilities
? Change in grades or attendance at school
? Irritability
? Lying or stealing
? Evidence of alcohol or drug use
? Lack of interest in activities they previously enjoyed
? Going through unusually large amounts of money
? Being overly secretive or wanting to lock their bedroom door
? Acting out or withdrawing
Again any of these by themselves may be normal for your adolescent, but if it is a sudden change, lasts over a period of time, and is in combination with other changes, it may be time to look for some help.
Perhaps the most important thing to do when you believe there’s a problem is to simply talk to your teen. Most teens will talk about their feelings when they feel trust and respect. Don’t assume they know you care, remind them. Then explain the changes you have seen, and ask if they recognize that something is different. Most teen problems are not the big major issues that make parents scared and reluctant to ask. It will be nice to find out that he or she is upset because they are having problems with their friends. If it turns out to be something bigger, you can then ask for some help.
Dennis Rozema is a Licensed Professional Counselor who specializes in adolescent and family issues at Indianwood Psychological Group. He is always willing to discuss any concerns or issues you may be having.
He can be contacted by email at drozema@wowway.com. If you have ideas or issues you would like addressed in a column please email your suggestions.